French Toast With Caramel and Banana

 

Burden

As I’ve mentioned before, one of my favorite things is eating and awesome dish and going home and trying to recreate it in a simple way. This one is no different.  Hold onto your butts because I’m about to make breakfast right!

French Toast Banana Foster1. You’ll need bananas(duh), butter, an egg, milk, cinnamon, vanilla extract, brown sugar and a nice thick toast like Texas toast. None of that wimpy shit.

French Toast Banana Foster2. Slice your fucking banana.

French Toast Banana Foster3.  Melt half a stick of butter in a saucepan and add a cup of brown sugar. Once that bitch caramelizes add a half cup of milk and a tablespoon of vanilla and lower the heat after stirring. 

French Toast Banana Foster4. For the French Toast mix, add equal amounts beaten egg and milk. Coat the top with cinnamon. If anyone ever tells you that you use too much cinnamon you need to cut that mofo from your life. Beat it vigorously(TWSS).

French Toast Banana Foster5. Dip both sides of the toast in the mix and let it soak it up. Fry both sides in butter until golden. Once the toast it cooked place bananas and caramel sauce over it.

French Toast Banana Foster

6. Fall into a diabetic coma.

 

Pardon Me

I haven’t forgotten you! Sometimes life gets in the way and I’m sorry for that. More coming soon.

Actually, I’m not sorry. You’ll be patient dammit!

Baking Bread Has Never Been So Easy!

A Hulk Sized Hunger

So a while back I posted this gem on my Facebook Page(which you should join because I’m awesome). Of course I couldn’t share that with you and NOT try it for myself. I mean..c’mon… what kind of cooking blog would this be otherwise? Well it worked deliciously. It will bring all the girls to your yard…or something like that.

Maple Walnut Bread1. Self rising flour, bread pan, shortening, and maple walnut ice cream. GOOD local ice cream from a place like UConn Dairy Bar or Shady Glen’s. What? You don’t live in Connecticut? Good for you(No seriously, good for you).

Maple Walnut Bread2. Mix two cups of ice cream with one and a half cups self rising flour.

Maple Walnut Bread3. Grease the pan and lump that dough in there. Bake for 45 minutes at the oddly specific temperature of 356 degrees.

Maple Walnut Bread4. Holy shit! It’s bread?! This is the greatest thing since ice cream itself!

Bacon AND Cheese? Madness.

Today we make bacon and chicken mac and cheese… well… rotini and cheese. I chose rotini for this recipe because it has more spirarly surface area to capture cheesy goodness.

Rotini Vs. Macaroni

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese1.  5 thin sliced chicken breasts, 6 strips of extra thick center cut bacon, a stick of butter, panko, flour, adobo, pepper, chicken boullion,  sharp yellow cheddar, smoked white cheddar, and a cheese with a fancy name like Gruyere. Now set your damn oven to 350.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese2. Season chicken with adobo and pepper, cut bacon into inch long pieces and grate cheese.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese

3. Bring enough water to boil for 8 servings of rotini according to the box, add 4 tablespoons of broth.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese4.  Add 8 services of rotini…obviously.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese5. Fry bacon in a pan

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese6. Set aside bacon and cook chicken in bacon fat. Remember, we don’t fast fucking precious bacon fat here.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese7. Slice chicken into pieces and set aside.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese8. Drain pasta but save broth. Melt a stick a butter (Paula Dean would approve) and add a half cup of flour and stir. Slowly add grated cheese and stir till smooth. Resist urges to eat all the cheese.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese9. Add pasta, bacon and chicken and stir that shit up.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese10. Place into a dish that will actually fit all of it and coat the top with panko crumbs. Bake in oven until the top browns.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese11. Enjoy bitches. Yes I burned part of it. Deal with it.

Today We Eat Like A Jamaican Who Gives A F***

 

Oh look at me! I’m using an ingredient that you may or may not be able to find. That makes me all special and different! Better go to Whole Paycheck! If you can’t find the proper greens for callaloo just substitute for some equally rough roughage like collard greens or something.Callaloo1. Pepper, Onion, Tomato, Olive Oil, Soy Sauce, Chopped Callaloo.

collaloo22. Dice your tomato, onion and pepper.

Callaloo3.  Stir fry that shit up in olive oil till it gets pulpy.

Callaloo

4. Add your greens and a bit of soy sauce or some other seasoning you like, I don’t really care.

Callaloo5. Stir, lower heat and cover. Cook down to desired doneness. I like mine still a little crunchy but some people like to cook it down till it’s soft and soggy.

Callaloo6. Serve it beside some real food…because it’s still rabbit food.