Bacon AND Cheese? Madness.

Today we make bacon and chicken mac and cheese… well… rotini and cheese. I chose rotini for this recipe because it has more spirarly surface area to capture cheesy goodness.

Rotini Vs. Macaroni

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese1.  5 thin sliced chicken breasts, 6 strips of extra thick center cut bacon, a stick of butter, panko, flour, adobo, pepper, chicken boullion,  sharp yellow cheddar, smoked white cheddar, and a cheese with a fancy name like Gruyere. Now set your damn oven to 350.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese2. Season chicken with adobo and pepper, cut bacon into inch long pieces and grate cheese.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese

3. Bring enough water to boil for 8 servings of rotini according to the box, add 4 tablespoons of broth.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese4.  Add 8 services of rotini…obviously.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese5. Fry bacon in a pan

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese6. Set aside bacon and cook chicken in bacon fat. Remember, we don’t fast fucking precious bacon fat here.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese7. Slice chicken into pieces and set aside.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese8. Drain pasta but save broth. Melt a stick a butter (Paula Dean would approve) and add a half cup of flour and stir. Slowly add grated cheese and stir till smooth. Resist urges to eat all the cheese.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese9. Add pasta, bacon and chicken and stir that shit up.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese10. Place into a dish that will actually fit all of it and coat the top with panko crumbs. Bake in oven until the top browns.

Bacon and Chicken Mac and Cheese11. Enjoy bitches. Yes I burned part of it. Deal with it.

Dry Jerk Chicken Wings

Saying dry jerk rub never comes out right but that’s what we’re doing today anyways. I usually make a wet jerk sauce/marinade but I decided to experiment with a dry spice blend.

Dry Jerk Rub1. You’ll need wings, flour and your whole fucking spice cabinet.

Dry Jerk Rub2. Mix 2 tablespoons allspice and thyme leaves. 3 teaspoons red pepper, black pepper and sage. 1 and a half teaspoons nutmeg and cinnamon. 4 tablespoons garlic power. 2 tablespoons sugar. 2 teaspoons lemon zest, orange peel and adobo. I told you you’d need your whole spice cabinet.

Dry Jerk Rub3. Season chicken wings with adobo because I can’t get enough of that magical shit.

Dry Jerk Rub4. Toss wings in flour.

Dry Jerk Rub5. Fry them.

Dry Jerk Rub6. Or bake them (if you’re into that sort of thing)

Dry Jerk Rub7.  Toss with a little of the spice blend. Serve and watch people be impressed with your fancy ass chicken wings.

Today We Take It Easy

Here’s a quick one for you mother fuckers. Nothing fancy here, but sometimes you don’t feel like dicking around the kitchen for an hour, also I haven’t used adobo in awhile.

Chicken and Potato Stir Fry

1. An equal volume of chicken and potato and about as much scallion. Also teriyaki, pepper, and adobo. Oh, and olive oil

Chicken and Potato Stir Fry

2. Wedge potato pieces and microwave for 8 minutes.

Chicken and Potato Stir Fry3. Cut that sexy ass chicken breast into 1 to 2 inch pieces and do the same with the scallions. Season chicken with pepper and adobo.

Chicken and Potato Stir Fry4.  Fry up the chicken in some olive oil

Chicken and Potato Stir Fry5. Add potato and scallion when chicken is almost done

Chicken and Potato Stir Fry6. Add teriyaki.

Chicken and Potato Stir Fry7. Enjoy, but fast. You’ve got more important shit to do.

Today We Get a Taste of The Bahamas

Fashion Sense

“Fuck you guys…”

One of my favorite spots in the Caribbean (besides Jamaica) is the Bahamas.  After having a soup called Chicken Souse down there I just knew I had to try and duplicate it when I went back home. It quickly became a favorite.

Chicken Souse1. An equal volume chicken wing pieces and potatoes. Half as much onion and celery. Salt and pepper and a few lemons or limes, doesn’t matter which dem allll sowwah!

Chicken Souse2. Add chicken to pot

Chicken Souse3. Peel and wedge potatoes. Get someone to peel them for you because no one likes peeling things. Add to pot

Chicken Souse4. Slice onion and chop celery. Try not to cry like a little wuss. Add to pot and bring to boil

Chicken Souse5. Juice the limes

Chicken Souse6. Once the chicken and potatoes are half cooked add salt, lots of pepper and half the lime juice.

Chicken Souse7. Once the chicken is cooked down and the potatoes are soft add the rest of the lime juice.

Chicken Souse8. Enjoy the shit out of it

Today We Make Chicken Diane

Chicken Diane1. You’ll need: Two thinly sliced chicken breasts, scallions, Dijon mustard, a cup of chicken broth, olive oil, parsley, Adobo, pepper, and brandy.

Chicken Diane2. Season chicken with pepper and Adobo.

Chicken Diane3. Cook a few minutes on both sides until done. Leave that oil and delicious chicken fat in the pan on medium.

Chicken Diane4. Chop of a few green onions

Chicken Diane5. Add one cup broth, green onions, three tablespoons Dijon and a half cup brandy to the pan and whisk. Not too much brandy, ain’t nobody tryin’ to get drunk off of pasta sauce.

Chicken Diane6. Add some parsley and whisk again.

Chicken Diane7. Pour over chicken and eat up fools!