Now…I am not much of a salad making person. I definitely eat my
rabbit food greens, but as far as regular old salads go that’s not my thing. Therefore, I’m gonna teach you fools how to make my kind of salad.
1. SHIT YOU NEED: 1 ripe Avocado, 1 Tomato, 1 Shallot, 1 Lemon or Lime, Minced Garlic, Red Pepper, some Cilantro
2. HOW DO YOU CHOOSE A RIPE AVOCADO? LISTEN. Take that shit by both ends and squeeze a bit. If that shit don’t give, then I don’t give a shit, it ain’t ready.
3. Dice tomatoes and shallots and place into a bowl.
4. Chop a little cilantro and let it hang out with the tomatoes and onion’s little cousin.
5. Take the avocado, cut that bitch open and dice it. Throw it in the bowl
6. Add garlic
7. Dash of red pepper
8. Take half that lemon and MAKE IT RAIN!
9. Toss and enjoy! Now you’re ready to take on a marathon. Or you could just blood dope or use steroids like those other punks.